Both these exercises are about freedom for me!
The first one is/was a little harder for me to do, BUT my plan is to achieve it. My older boys (24, 22) have a step-mother that made my life a living hell (excuse my language) when they were in their teens. After all these years there are times that I let thoughts come into my head about things that happened and of how I should have responded differently. Little by little these thoughts are becoming less and less as I take control of my wellness. But as I stated from time to time it is a struggle for me. So instead of saying "all individuals" during this exercise I stated:
May Rebecca gain freedom from suffering
May Rebecca find sustained health, happiness, and wholeness
May I assist Rebecca in gaining freedom from suffering
May I assist Rebecca in finding health, happiness, and wholeness
My plan is to make this part of my daily "alone time" ritual in the hopes that I will at least learn to forgive her and in the process of my praying and repeating I will be able to heal her.
The second exercise (assessment) is something I have been needing to do for a very long time! An urgent area of distress for me is our finances. We have plenty of money to pay our bills on time each month and to put food on the table (thank God) but we have an excessive amount of credit card debt! Yes, this is the same area that I need growth and development in personally. The reason I want this to be a focus of growth and development for me is because, one when my hubby retires from the military in 5-years I want him to be able to decide on his own if he truly wants to work another full time job or not. Two I don't ever want to worry that we can't provide for our family or ourselves. I want us to be able to live a simple life without all the major worries especially once the all the kids have grown and gone and we are living the retirement life!
What can I do to ensure that? Well, keep paying all of our bills on time, get a part time job (which I have recently) and put all my part time income towards the credit cards and finally (the BIGGEST one for me) is to ask myself "do I NEED that (whatever that is)" before I make the purchase! Some of these are easier said than done for me, BUT I'm so willing to try. I want to be able to live my best life ever and show my children that simple living and finding wholeness via your mind, body and soul is a wonderful thing!!!
Until next time my friends, eat healthy, exercise and be happy:-)
Cindy
Cindy, I really admire your honesty about what you have been through. I have had some scary and emotionally draining incidents with my daughter’s father, but I never really faced my situation. I was, and still am unfortunately, afraid of him. I now realize this affects me, and not him. I am giving him power over me once again. I feel like this exercise will help me forgive him, just like it’s helping you I your situation. It’s difficult to face these things and heal, but so much better for us in the long run!
ReplyDeleteCindy,
ReplyDeleteThe area of finances have been determined to be an area that bring lots of stress in families. My wife and I have recently come to the point that you are in. We make enough money to be able to meet all our bills but credit card debts will take half of the money. We got to a point that we decided to be proactive and ask ourselves the question you have put across-Do we really need that? That questions makes someone focus and make the right decisions. It is also true that being role models to our kids will also make them responsible persons and wellness and integral health will be achieved.
David
I did not even think about finances when I thought about areas I needed to work on. My husband and I have made a dent in our debt, but it's only a dent. There is much more to pay and I am hoping we can get it paid before our oldest is 16, which gives us 11 years. That sounds like an outrageous amount of time, but I know it will fly by and things always come up that end up having to be put on a card. At that time my husband will be retiring from the military, and I have the same hope as you, that my husband will be able to choose whether he wants to work or not. I know he probably will, but he should, after 20 years in the Army, have the opportunity to choose and even take some time off if he would like. I do the same thing you do when I buy something. I always ask if I absolutely need it, and 9 times out of 10 I'll tell myself no. My husband and I live simple, and make sure our children have what they need and a little extra, not a lot but some. Times goes by fast and we want to make sure they enjoy their childhood and have wonderful memories.
ReplyDeleteCindy,
ReplyDeleteIt takes a strong person to forgive some things and even stronger to wish them well so good for you! I often have to ask myself the same things when it comes to making purchases but it does end up helping. Glad the exercise was beneficial for you.
Cindy,
ReplyDeleteI have been lucky that I have not had to deal with ex's, but many of my friends have and it was not always easy. I can relate to your story though because through the years I have had to give forgiveness. It can sometimes take a lot of effort. The loving kindness exercise does help to make it easier I think.
You are not alone with debt. We all have it. We were recently looking at our finances and wondering how we got in the mess we are in too. Finances can add a lot of stress. Right now I am just looking to get through the next couple of weeks. We are trying to cut the excess spending out too so we can get a little bit back on track.
For me, I know I need to look at following up on medical appointments to take better care of myself, but that costs money too.
Hang in there. Working two jobs is tough and even tougher when going to school. It sounds like you have a good plan though.
Elicia